Midnight confessions

I confess that night feedings aren't my best moments.

I confess I despise hearing my husband snore so peacefully while I'm awake...

I confess that I have never wanted to give up breast feeding more than I do at our 12-5am feedings.

I confess that I secretly love falling asleep in our rocking chair with her once she is milk drunk.

I confess that I love crawling back into bed feeling successful after putting her back to bed and being cuddled by my husband... Even if it takes an hour. 

I confess that I play cell phone games while feeding her to keep my mind awake. 

I confess that I HATE cleaning all the things it takes to feed my baby...and I cannot wait till I can solely breastfeed. 

I confess that I secretly love seeing her little pouty face get mad when I have to pull her away from me to burp her and she starts to whimper.

I confess that even though at times I doubt myself...I love this. 

Xoxo

B

Baby stories // week two

 

 Two weeks. It's been two weeks since our little girl was born. I can hardly believe how fast the time is going. After having family here to help for the first two weeks, this is my first day "flying solo."  I have to say with dinner in the crock pot, and little Taylor sleeping away, I feel pretty successful. 

Taylor and I have so much to learn and I could not be more thankful for this time we have together. It's amazing how someone so small can take up the entirety of your heart.

Thank you to everyone who provided us with dinner the past weeks. Not only did it help to not have to worry about dinner, but I am so impressed with our friends cooking skills!!! 

Our little family is lucky to have you all in our lives.

Happy Monday!

xoxo

B & T

Any day now...

On the eve of 38 weeks and with only one “work” day left, I find myself completely excited and numb (for a lack of better words) at the same time. I am excited to have the next three months off to gather my thoughts, be able to have mornings without an alarm, and to be able to be in my own thoughts before the baby comes.  I ‘m looking forward  to be able to have a little time to plan, journal and blog my big plans for my framing business and design business to help keep our little family afloat while on maternity leave.

I think I have thought about all the possibilities about how life will be when the baby comes that I just can’t think anymore. What if she’s a terribly unhappy baby? What if I’m a terribly unhappy mother? What if she doesn't start feeding right away? What if she has colic? What If I lose my mind? What if I have to call my husband to come home to give me just a moment to gather myself (or cry alone in the bathroom so no one knows I’m losing it). But oh…what if she’s perfect…sleeps thorough the night…latches on right away…coos and melts my heart.  I make myself go crazy. I mean, coming from a large family, and being one of the older cousins, babies are no unknown territory for me. I know how to take care of a new born….right? At least I think I have a grasp. These are the thoughts that circle my head all day. My real fears when it comes to bringing this little girl in to this world. I guess we will just have to find out when she arrives. Any day now….